Why is dad so mean?

My 8 year old screamed this morning: You are so mean to me, you don't care about me, I want another dad.

- He wants me to learn a lesson, especially when I am in pain
- He rushes me in the morning, and counts to five for a timeout.
- He demands me to listen, and shut up.
- He asks me to take care of my business.

Why?

Life is not easy -- keep on learning
We are extremely lucky, considering many people every minute who don't have basic needs like food, shelter, medicine. But this doesn't mean we will continue to be lucky and plentiful. Prosperity is a luxury, and life plays nasty tricks on people when you are least prepared. Learning from your life, other people's life, schools, books, will keep you better prepared. So when life's big challenges knocks on your door, you are more likely to say, "I can take care of it."

Pick your battle -- respect of authority
Nobody can win every battle. It is unfair for anybody to win everything. If you are winning every battle, somebody else will lose. So you need to pick your battle carefully. You won many battles -- regular computer time, ClubPenguin daily, online games, etc. But putting somebody on the spot is NOT the way to win battles. If I am rushing in the morning, you won't get 3 more minutes on the computer because you are in the middle of something. When mom or I ask you to be quick, we expect you to follow directions. If you don't agree, discuss later.

Win your biggest battle -- your independence
If I threw you to the woods this morning, you possibly wouldn't survive. Why? You are not independent yet. But sooner or later, you will be an independent person, since nobody (including mom and dad) can't and won't be always be with you. Independence is a big word. The first step to become independent is to take care of your own business. Think of independence as drawing a picture on a blank paper, then taking care of your own business is the first dot you put on the page. Start small, and you can achieve a lot.

I can't foresee all that is coming, and I won't have all the answers. But I know for sure these fundamental things are essential to a productive life. I love you, as a dad.